So Mark Salling, Puck from Glee took his own life on Tuesday. He was thirty five. He was awaiting sentencing for being found guilty of possessing child pornography.
Those who knew him say he was struggling with “demons” and that he was “isolated” and “depressed” due to his upcoming sentencing for possessing more than 25,000 images of child porn, more than 600 videos. Come again? I don’t even have 25,000 images of my kids, or family members. That’s an awful lot of images to have of anyone, or anything. Some of them had children as young as three in them.
Okay. Let’s say that together…some of the images and videos on his computer were with, or should I say had ACTS BEING COMMITTED AGAINST CHILDREN AS YOUNG AS THREE.
I’m sorry, but there is nothing that anybody could be fighting against within themselves that makes that understandable.
I can’t even.
Some are saying/speculating that he was clearly victimized as a child. Yet there is no information to support that theory that this is why he supported the child pornography industry, because he was stuck at an age of his own abuse.
Perhaps that’s true, maybe he was sexually abused as a small child, and if that happened to him that is a damn shame, and it is brutal and horrible that an innocent child would be abused in that way. I sort of understand how a person might get “stuck” at an age when their own abuse took place. I can make that work in my brain and find empathy for the victim. But what I cannot reconcile is perpetuating the abuse. If you’re a person who was sexually abused as a small, young child, wouldn’t you know first hand how awful it was to live and survive that horror. Wouldn’t you think that you would do and become the opposite of what was done unto you?
I mean I suppose not if the person who had suffered abuse didn’t heal it. Didn’t get help for it, and get support in understanding that what was done to you was wrong. Maybe, if you’re made to believe by your abuser that an adult getting sexual gratification from you, a young child, was normal, or love. Perhaps somewhere in your mind in order to live, to not crumble and lose your mind you tell yourself that it isn’t wrong for an adult to be attracted to you, and then you, the victim continue the sick cycle instead of getting the help you need.
I don’t really know, how Mark Salling, a handsome, talented, successful young man goes down the road of child pornography for his own gratification. I don’t know why a guy who is living the high life on a hit series in America doesn’t go and get help for his sickness when he has the means to get well. I can’t begin to understand why he instead chose to live a life in darkness, endorsing and supporting a dark, insidious industry that is not only destroying the lives of innocent babies, but making money off the cruel, vicious, unimaginable acts against children who have absolutely no idea what it is that is being done to them.
I just don’t get it, and there is nothing anybody can write back to me that will get me to even try to understand it.
I will end on this note; as a mother I can’t imagine out living any one of my girls. I cannot begin to imagine how I would feel if one of my girls took their own lives. I don’t know if I could even breathe if this was my new reality. But I will say this, even though I have empathy for his mother, there must be something that she and her husband did, or overlooked that made this man into such a monster, and a coward. I mean, he was willing to use/possess illegal material of babies, young children, and prepubescent girls for his own pleasure, and when the time came for him to pay the piper, for being part of the sick and twisted problem that keeps this industry alive and well, instead of taking his punishment, he chickened out. So he was both a pig and a chicken.
I’m sure this post, and my anger toward him and his choices will receive a lot of feedback, and I get it, he was unwell, he might have been an untreated victim himself, blah, blah, blah. Where I sit, there is nothing that he could have suffered that would help me to understand why he willingly participated in the brutal abuse of innocent children for his own satisfaction. We all know that this is wrong. This isn’t new information. Everybody knows that child pornography is way off the scale of normal. I do truly feel for his mom, but, I also happen to think one less person like this on the planet, famous or otherwise, is alright with me.