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Is it too soon to say that one less person like Mark Salling on earth is a good thing?

So Mark Salling, Puck from Glee took his own life on Tuesday.  He was thirty five.  He was awaiting sentencing for being found guilty of possessing child pornography.

Those who knew him say he was struggling with “demons” and that he was “isolated” and “depressed” due to his upcoming sentencing for possessing more than 25,000 images of child porn, more than 600 videos.  Come again?  I don’t even have 25,000 images of my kids, or family members.  That’s an awful lot of images to have of anyone, or anything.  Some of them had children as young as three in them.

Okay.  Let’s say that together…some of the images and videos on his computer were with, or should I say had ACTS BEING COMMITTED AGAINST CHILDREN AS YOUNG AS THREE.

I’m sorry, but there is nothing that anybody could be fighting against within themselves that makes that understandable.

Three.

I can’t even.

Some are saying/speculating that he was clearly victimized as a child.  Yet there is no information to support that theory that this is why he supported the child pornography industry, because he was stuck at an age of his own abuse.

Perhaps that’s true, maybe he was sexually abused as a small child, and if that happened to him that is a damn shame, and it is brutal and horrible that an innocent child would be abused in that way.  I sort of understand how a person might get “stuck” at an age when their own abuse took place.  I can make that work in my brain and find empathy for the victim.  But what I cannot reconcile is perpetuating the abuse.  If you’re a person who was sexually abused as a small, young child, wouldn’t you know first hand how awful it was to live and survive that horror.  Wouldn’t you think that you would do and become the opposite of what was done unto you?

I mean I suppose not if the person who had suffered abuse didn’t heal it.  Didn’t get help for it, and get support in understanding that what was done to you was wrong.  Maybe, if you’re made to believe by your abuser that an adult getting sexual gratification from you, a young child, was normal, or love.  Perhaps somewhere in your mind in order to live, to not crumble and lose your mind you tell yourself that it isn’t wrong for an adult to be attracted to you, and then you, the victim continue the sick cycle instead of getting the help you need.

Maybe.

I don’t really know, how Mark Salling, a handsome, talented, successful young man goes down the road of child pornography for his own gratification.  I don’t know why a guy who is living the high life on a hit series in America doesn’t go and get help for his sickness when he has the means to get well.  I can’t begin to understand why he instead chose to live a life in darkness, endorsing and supporting a dark, insidious industry that is not only destroying the lives of innocent babies, but making money off the cruel, vicious, unimaginable acts against children who have absolutely no idea what it is that is being done to them.

I just don’t get it, and there is nothing anybody can write back to me that will get me to even try to understand it.

I will end on this note; as a mother I can’t imagine out living any one of my girls. I cannot begin to imagine how I would feel if one of my girls took their own lives.  I don’t know if I could even breathe if this was my new reality.  But I will say this, even though I have empathy for his mother, there must be something that she and her husband did, or overlooked that made this man into such a monster, and a coward.  I mean, he was willing to use/possess illegal material of babies, young children, and prepubescent girls for his own pleasure, and when the time came for him to pay the piper, for being part of the sick and twisted problem that keeps this industry alive and well, instead of taking his punishment, he chickened out.  So he was both a pig and a chicken.

I’m sure this post, and my anger toward him and his choices will receive a lot of feedback, and I get it, he was unwell, he might have been an untreated victim himself, blah, blah, blah.  Where I sit, there is nothing that he could have suffered that would help me to understand why he willingly participated in the brutal abuse of innocent children for his own satisfaction.  We all know that this is wrong.  This isn’t new information.  Everybody knows that child pornography is way off the scale of normal.  I do truly feel for his mom, but, I also happen to think one less person like this on the planet, famous or otherwise, is alright with me.

6 Comments

  1. I have always thought that – no matter what might have happened in your childhood – when you reach a certain age and have acquired some social life experiences, you are responsible for your own actions. He was old enough to know that what he was doing was against the law, and he did it anyway. The fact that it was child pornography should send him to another level of Hell.

  2. While i agree with not judging others who choose to end their lives, in this case i can only believe that this being knew what abuse he himself would be subjected to unless placed in protective isolation.

    Countless millions of individuals are victims of sexual abuse around the globe. Most have probably never received any sort of treatment to assist in their healing, yet finding them in possession of images of the very actions that caused their scarring in the first place seems to be a rare occurance.

    To collect the sheer volume of images is not the act of someone attempting to heal and understand. It is the act of a sick, twisted individual who finds gratification in these images. For the babies of any age depicted, my heart breaks.

  3. I have to TOTALLY AGREE. I am sad when someone is so troubled that they take their own life. But this did not make me sad. It made me Angry. This man knew what he was doing was wrong and continued and continued and then continued again,. 25,000 and 600 videos??? I absolutely agree that he was a coward. I am sorry that his mother (parents?) are suffering this loss. I too can’t imagine loosing a child. But this ‘child’ was evil and chose Not to accept the punishment he deserved. And No, I don’t think taking his own life was punishment, Not for him. He chose the easy way out for him, a way that devastated anyone left who had loved him. In supporting that industry, he took himself out of human race and just finalized that departure at the end.
    Thank you for expressing this so well.

  4. I don’t feel comfortable passing judgment on people I don’t know. I also don’t believe in the sanctity of life just for life’s sake alone. He was caught and was going to pay the price by going to jail. If jailtime made his life not worth living, who am I to judge him a coward? A close friend of mine committed suicide after decades of soul destroying depression. Was she a coward? On the contrary, it was her life, her decision and I honor her choice. Salling’s sexual predation certainly is loathsome and we can all condemn him for it, whatever his childhood circumstances. But his life and career destroyed were now destroyed. What he chose to do after that is not for me to say.

  5. This is well worth discussing. Two days ago, I made the comment on Twitter after reading Mark’s lawyer was describing him as a “gentle soul” after his suicide. I strongly objected to the fact this man was a convicted child pornography criminal – that in my mind is NOT a gentle man. Not in any sense of the word. i found the attempt to glorify this man (not a teen or young man in his 20’s) as someone to admire very distasteful. He cancelled being “a gentle man” with these proven charges. Just consider if a close male friend was found to have child pornography on his computer and you knew – would you still feel as you did for that person? Would you turn them in to the police? For me, the first answer would be I could no longer be a friend. The second would be I’d see that person as a criminal and would inform the police. There would be no warning the person ahead of time either. Child pornography, which I will never see, sickens me. I was unaware of this even occurring until I owned a computer and heard about ‘it’ being online. It is vicious, evil abuse of children and I’m aware some are as young as 1 years old, it’s not an exaggeration. I once heard a talk by a Vancouver Police Homicide Detective at a hospital presentation for our Emergency medical staff. She related being involved in a case of the rape of a tiny baby and the baby died due to the injuries. I cried as she did telling us about this and she said it haunts her still. So, this Mark, who didn’t live long enough to hear his sentence of how many years of prison he would have to serve, was a coward, irregardless of the depression and anxiety alluded to since his arrest and conviction. The thing to remember, IF he’d not been arrested, he’d still be watching child pornography – and that is a fact. Child, teen abuse is rampant, money-making for the evil people involved in having such available online and need to be arrested and jailed. Hopefully, some of the internet sites used by this man will result in arrests and maybe save some children from future abuse.

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