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Do people really think the only problems I have in my life are rats, and a tree?

The cool thing about writing a blog, and having a dual step moderation on comments is that shitty comments don’t just make it up on the site, for which I’m very thankful.  Some people have challenged me saying that I only post comments, interact, or tweet with people who share the same opinion or ideals as I do.  I can see how you would think that by reading the comments, or seeing my tweets, but allow me to give you some back story on the “why” of that.

When I began writing my blog about experiences I’ve had in the world that make me go “hmmm” there were quite a lot of moments, which ended up as posts, that were riled up, combative, and in some cases down right negative.  The more I wrote the more I healed.  I’ve said it more times than I can count that I “run hot” and more often than not my first instinct in any and every life situation is to “mouth off.”  As the years have gone on, I’ve been writing this daily blog now for almost two years, I’ve changed.  I’ve changed because I’ve made a conscious decision to be different, and because as we age, we really and truly begin to give less, and less, fucks about the stuff around us that we cannot change.  Another thing changed, and this I think might have been the biggest reason for the tone of my blog going more to the “light-hearted” fair that I feel it has become.

Trump happened.

And with Trump came so much hatred, anger, negativity and bullshit that I honestly didn’t want to be that person who added fuel to anybody’s fire of upset.  So, now, these days rather than harp on all that’s wrong in our world (although I will still do that about something I’m incredibly passionate about)I choose, daily to write something that might make people giggle, or sleep better at night.  Hence the:  “to cut the tree down or not” WWYDW.  For the most part, many of you were so wonderful, lending insight and genuine advice and aid, and then, as always there were a few of you, and you know who you are, even though your shitty comments will never see the light of day, who were down right rude, and actually offensive.

Here’s the thing, if those of you who wrote those shitty comments really think that the biggest worries I have in my life are; who is going to tend to my dogs while I travel (again, as you put it), or that one of my three house has rats, and that the brand new cottage has a tree in my view, wah, wah, wah…you’re a dumb ass.

I have many, many deeper concerns in my life than those things.  I have things going on around me, in my extended family, in my immediate one, my career, my marriage and life that are considerably more difficult and upsetting than those most recent blogs would have you believe.

But guess what?  I’m not going to share any of that on my daily blog, and the main reason for that is out of respect and honour for the other people in my life that these issues are also affecting.  So yeah, you know what I may not have cancer, thank God, each and every time I do an ultrasound/mammogram on my breast that is on watch, I do another victory dance that today, this time it isn’t me.  Every single time one of my daughters gets from point A to B safely, I breath a sigh of relief.  Whenever I hear about another shooting, or terrorist attack, I remind myself that by the grace of God my Mikaela was a block and a half away from the cafe attack in Paris, and I still have her to love and be with, never-mind that two set of fires in California raged within miles of my home, and my daugther’s house.

So as you can see, I’ve been spared.  A lot.  Am I a lucky person? Fuck yeah I am.  But should I not celebrate this luck in any way I see fit??

Hmmm, hmmm, hmmm.

Anyway, don’t come at me assuming that what you read on this blog is the only challenging, upsetting, difficult thing that I’m dealing with in my life, because you’re dead wrong.  So wrong in fact that even today our sweet boy Duke is headed into surgery to remove two large masses from his tail.  I’m here in Toronto, and he’s in LA, our middle girl, who’s dog he is, is having to deal with this all on her own. Yeah sure, he’s just a dog, and it might not be cancer, but I’ve lost two dogs to cancer already.  I’m hoping to not have to do it again…

You see we all have things that weigh heavy on our hearts, but just because we’re not sharing it doesn’t mean it isn’t there…so, for the love of God, think before you type.

PHOTO CREDIT:  @thekittyholland

12 Comments

  1. Wow. Just wow. There are people that thought that the issue/topics you post on your PUBLIC blog are the ONLY issues with which you deal in your life? Seriously? That’s a whole other level of stupid. I was going to say “cluelessness” and/or “naivete”, but nope, I’m staying with “stupid”.

    It’s been said many times (by me and others) that we readers appreciate what you DO share with us: the way you think, the way you encourage others to think and care about things, the way you engage all of us in the trials and tribulations that you care to share. Stay running hot – hell, boil over! – stay true to yourself, and thank you for starting these conversations. I appreciate it!

  2. Keep “running hot,” girl! Those who can’t take the heat need to leave the kitchen or get their own blog. Best wishes with your pooch. We’ve been dealing with a cat with cancer for about 18 months. And yes, we’re grateful, despite the $4/day pill, he’s still around after his 3-month prognosis.

  3. I totally get this. I’m the type of person who tends to post on social media when I am really happy or excited about something. Many people (relatives included) think that equates to me having this wonderful and exciting life. The truth is there are so many things that I deal with on my own every day. I don’t post happy stuff to try to portray myself as a certain person either. Maybe it’s a problem that I don’t share the bad/hard stuff and keep it inside but it’s how I deal. 🙂

    Great post!

    And I hope your dog is okay!

  4. Oh My God. where do those people come from and how dare they come at you for Anything. Much less for being too light hearted. If you are passionate about something WRITE about it and to hell with the stupid people who obviously have NOTHING in their lives. Good or Bad. I am glad that you don’t post the awful things that are said. I am just sorry you have seen them. again Block them if you can. I don’t know how that works. I hope you I know that there are a lot more caring people out here who appreciate all that you write. We May not agree and you are OK with our expressing that but we dobn’t even think about attacking you for being you,

    On the Duke front. I know how hard it is for you not to be there with him, He has a loved one with him, and I wish him and you the best for a positive outcome and his quick recovery.

  5. Bravo. You shouldn’t have to justify your existence to anyone. Your list reminds me of the blind man feeling the elephant. What you post is just a tiny slice of your reality. Good having your mammograms and check ups. I discovered breast cancer very early and 23 years later I’m still here. Hope Duke’s tests are negative. Your daughter is more than capable of managing this. Don’t worry until you absolutely have to, ever. It’s a waste of time.

  6. I am consistently confused as to why these rude negative people bother to read and comment on a blog they obviously are not enjoying. Why? Why go to the trouble?
    I really enjoy your thoughts and views as you, like us all, navigate through this life we’ve been given. Some thoughts I’m not quite 100% with you on but I really like how it makes me stop for a minute and go hmmmm. Even if it’s just to figure out maybe I don’t quite agree, but makes me look at what I do believe. Makes me think and look at something in a different way. May still not agree, but my goodness what a great way to check in with yourself. Then there are your posts that are just fun. Makes me smile a bit and chuckle then go about my day. A little lift….who doesn’t need that these days! I think more of this is happening as people read your blog than the other negative crap. Write on. Blog on. Onward and upward! Leave the shits in your dust!

  7. “Yeah sure, he’s just a dog” no he’s part of your family and you have every right to be just as upset as you would be with anyone else. Sending positive vibes to you guys, wishing him a safe surgery and speedy recovery!

  8. Shantelle, I am sorry about the comments you have been receiving. I had no idea that people were truly that mean. I enjoy the questions you post on your blog because it allows me to see the light part of life and not to have to focus on the shitty things in my life ( like finding out on FB that a long time friend of mine died unexpectedly of which I would rather have received a phone call). Btw, I really like the idea of taking down the tree and planting 3 in its place 😊

  9. I just finished reading your blog and, if I may, I’m sending you a virtual hug. Mrs Bisson you do not have to explain/defend anything you have written in your own blog to anyone. Your blog is your thoughts alone. IMO, you should just ignore the rude/shi**y comments offered up by jealous/envious people.

    As a fur baby momma of 2 dogs, I understand your concerns. My hopes and best wishes go to you, your daughter and, of course, Duke that te results are all good. Take care.

  10. WOW, Double WOW this had me to the point of tears! We all have our own demons/problems and the keyboard nazis need to take a chill pill.
    I for one like reading the light hearted stuff, but know that is not a true reflection of what goes on in yours or anyone elses life.
    My heart goes out to you and your family for your fur babies full recovery!

  11. I’ve said it before, but I’m happy to repeat ad nauseam: Your blog, your rules!

    We all have our problems – some are private, and we don’t always want to share, some are more general, and we will share in order to gather insight from others. Just because someone is living some of their life in the spotlight, doesn’t mean they don’t get to keep private things private (unless, of course, you’re a paparazzo or ‘journalist’ for a gossip rag).

    Crossing all crossables for Duke.

  12. Shantelle life is to short to worry about those ass holes who criticize just because you are famous or have money, what goes on behind closed doors or walking in your shoes they do not know you worry about your family & others you & Yannick are beautiful people & I was taught if you have nothing good or nice to say then don’t say it even tho people have the right to say what they feel but word hurt in this day & ago we can’t afford to be hurt anymore so keep doing what you do saying what you say because I believe it’s the truth & your on target
    LV You & hope & pray Duke is OK

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