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How to recognize an over-programmed life; yours, or your child’s.

Alright, here we are again, the posts that accompany my on-air segments.  Hard to believe it is October already, school has been in for a month, and we’re all in full swing of the season for doing too many things, and ending up with zero time to just be still.  We do it to our kids, and we do it to ourselves.  So, how do we dial the over-programming back, asks the woman who just bought a marina in need of not only a renovation, but also day to day RUNNING of the business?

The answer is quite simple.  Prioritize the extracurricular activities that bring you joy.  Not just; “hey that was fun” but like you can’t wait to do said activity, as in you count down the days until it’s that time of week again, joy.  And, dare I suggest that if you’re a parent reading this, that you use this same marker for programming your kids.  If your kid is dragging their heels, whining and complaining when it’s time to get going to the activity you so thoughtfully researched, signed them up to, and paid for?  I have news for you; that’s not your kids thing.

The important thing to remember when adding anything extra to what is, for almost every single living breathing person that I know, a packed life and schedule, is to honour how adding something more on your plate makes you feel.  If it doesn’t feel good, remove it.  If it doesn’t feel good to your kid, pull them out (but only once they’ve seen whatever you’ve paid for through, or if they’re part of team…then they stay until the end.)  But, for the most part if there is something you’ve signed yourself up for that you thought you’d dig, but turns out you don’t at all, it’s never too late to pull the plug and explore something else that is of interest to you.  Because, I say this all the time; “life is simultaneously too long, and too short.”  So don’t spend a single minute engaged in something that doesn’t fulfill you.  And if you’re not going to do this to yourself, then don’t do it to your child.  Pay attention to signals, and listen to what they say.  Honour the fact that what might seem fun/interesting for you, is not necessarily going to be fun/interesting for them.  And when it comes to yourself, just because your friend lives for tennis, doesn’t mean it’s going to be for you.  Find your thing(s) and participate in it fully, and joyfully.  And, remember this final thing:  teaching your child how to be still, how to work through boredom will prove invaluable, because in life, everything that was once exciting and flashy, and new, will become, at some point, monotonous, dull, and a chore.  If we never teach them how to live in the quiet boredom of life, how will they ever know that when these moments come in their careers, or their love lives, how to work through it to stay, because as the saying goes:  “this too shall pass”.

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