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Do you think a 16 year old can decide his own future, and should a 6 year old be allowed to wear princess costumes to school?

Hello my Lovelies, as is the Friday norm, here are this week’s Dear Elle columns for you to read, comment, share and enjoy! Hope you had a good one today, I truly did!!

Dear Elle,

My six year old daughter has a big personality and I love it.  Her personality is showcased through her fashion choices too! The thing is, as least three times a week my daughter wants to wear princess dresses or costumes to school.  She looks totally great-but when is enough, enough?

From,

Princess and Dresses and Costumes

Dear Princess Dresses and Costumes,

This question is right up my alley.  Our middle girl LOVED playing make believe and dressing up!  She lived for being a princess. It was her entire life to dress up ALL THE DAMN TIME.  In fact, she loved dressing up so much that she’s now living in LA where she is a professional stylist.  You never know where these things just might take her. There is absolutely nothing wrong with your daughter dressing how she feels her best.  Trust me when I say that the “censorship” and pressure she’ll get from society about how to be a girl is coming for her, so why rush it along. Why thwart her passion, or her joy?  If she’s not hurting anybody and she isn’t violating her school dress code let her LIVE.

As a mom of daughters, I can assure you that the time is coming when life will try and kick your daughter down.  It will attempt to break her and cause her to conform, and you’ll be picking her up off the floor trying to encourage her to trust in her spirit and to be an individual.  Don’t be a part of the trying to fit her in a box crew. Be her champion, let her shine purely, and unfiltered.

Besides, have you ever seen a girl dressed in Princess costumes in university???  Everybody grows out of it in their own good time.

Live and let live mom.

Xo

Elle

Dear Elle,

My son is 16 years old and has found success as a YouTube gamer. He’s doing extremely well, having a lot of fun with it and in fact, he’s turned his love for gaming into a career. I’m here of it! As his mom, I think that going to college/university and having a back-up plan is still something I want him to consider. He is still just 16 and the shelf life of this type of career is uncertain. My son disagrees and he feels that he doesn’t need school. It’s a constant battle. I will always support him, but I truly believe that school is so important. How should I handle this situation?

From Gamer Mom

Hello Gamer Mom,

I am a mother to three artists.  Our eldest is a professional makeup artist, our middle girl is a professional stylist, and our youngest got a degree in broadcast journalism.  We spent a fortune having them educated at some of the best private high schools in Toronto, and then post-secondary education institutions.

Why do I tell you all this?  I’m telling you because, I hate to say it, but unless your son has the itch to be an architect, doctor, or lawyer, or a profession like any of these; there is no real point in going to university.  Everybody and their brother has a BA these days. Your son needs something greater than that if he’s going to enter the work force, for his “back up plan” as you referred to it as. So, if he doesn’t have a passion for any of those things, I say save your money, and your breath.

Except I would suggest this.  Having the gift to be a YouTube gamer might be enough NOW, but is he prepared for the future of gaming???  I know nothing about this world, but, if it’s like anything else in the tech/acting worlds, it changes on a dime.  You’re popular and then you’re not. It can all be over with, in minutes, just google Lindsay Lohan. Perhaps the compromise is that he needs to go and get a business, or marketing degree so that when the “hype” of what he’s doing starts to die down he has the tools in his tool belt to re-brand and manage his “business” with finesse and expertise.  Having a business or marketing degree under his belt will definitely put him out front of the gamer crowd and is something he can definitely fall back on if/when the gaming craze switches gears in a way that he might not be at the forefront of.

That’s how I would handle this if it were my YouTube gaming son.

Good Luck!

Elle

 

2 Comments

  1. Love your advice for the princess in training mom! The world tries to keep us in nice, neat boxes and too often that limits us in unhealthy ways. Letting our kids be kids and letting them express themselves in healthy ways is the very least we can do for them.

    Re: 16 year old gamer, very good advice, but I would add perhaps his mom could encourage him to take some art/game design courses so he can get in on the technical side of gaming when gaming actually stops paying (and, indeed, it will.). Staying in the industry, but in a different capacity is just one of those “crazy ideas” kids rarely consider.

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