Some facts about the Bisson dogs that make me go “hmmm” (photo S.FISHER & J.COOPER at getleashedmag.com)

Today is a snow day here in Toronto, we apparently were hit by another “surprise” snow storm…insert eye roll here…I mean it’s December people, where are your SNOW TIRES and your winter driving skills??  Why is everybody always so stunned into stupidity when we get snow?  I don’t get it.  Anyway I digress, and I’m bitching again which I swore I wouldn’t do with today’s post, I wanted to write something fast and fun to make up for all the time I lost on the roads today, so here goes.  I’m giving you secret information and blessing you all with a little Intel into the things about my four legged kids that make me go “hmmm” enjoy…

Mack, our oldest dog, who will be 12 in March, has recently been diagnosed with, to keep this simple, combined with the fact that I’m not a vet, and also don’t remember the actual medical terminology my vet used last week, with the equivalent of ALS (as my vet put it to me).  What’s currently happening with him is that his back legs slide out from under him, or just collapse entirely while he’s standing there minding his own business.  Apparently this is common because his brain is beginning to not communicate with his hind legs.  This is not fun to watch, it’s also not cool to watch Kohl just lean on him and manage to throw his footing off, so at the suggestion of my girlfriend I purchased some indoor non-slip pup socks for him.  He’s really great at letting me put them on him, he has no beef with that whatsoever, which is a good thing, right?  Right.  It’s a wonderful thing that he lets me slide them on his limp back legs without a struggle, but the thing about this that makes me go “hmmm” is if he doesn’t seem to mind letting me put them on him, then why is he constantly taking them off?  And, more importantly HOW IS HE GETTING THEM OFF???

Also, Mack can get his own collar off.  This is another “new talent” he’s somehow picked up in his old age.  This really makes me go “hmmm” because he has no thumbs, and from what I know about dogs they can’t raise their paw above their heads to reach around their necks to pull a collar off in the way we humans would pull a shirt off.  So how is he doing this???  Really, how?

I could go on and on about all the things that make go “hmmm” about Mack, but I don’t need you all to be here all night long, so moving on.

Kohl is obsessed with playing, he’s like having a two year old in our lives again.  He has two toy bins filled with stuffies, and he, for the most part, takes great care of them, some he’s had since Christmas last year, he’s what I would call a very proud and responsible stuffie owner.  Not only does he like to snuggle with them, and take good care of them, but he also loves to bring them to us, and every single person that comes through the door.  He’s quite the diplomatic and gives each baby a turn at being the chosen one.  He comes charging across the room with a stuffie in his mouth, nub wagging, giving a strong illusion that he wants to play with you.  But when you reach for whatever baby he has in his mouth, he doesn’t release it so you can throw it, or hold it, no, he hunkers down and attempts to engage you in a tug of war.  A game of tug of war that is so aggressive that he nearly, if you’re not ready for it, pulls you right off your feet and onto your ass.  He does this every single time, even with tennis balls.  This dog brings you things, Kohl will even chase things, but don’t expect him to drop it and let you play with him, no way.  Make no mistake about it, all these toys are his, “drop it” or “let go” are not commands he obeys, not when it comes to his toys.  Which puzzles me to no end and always makes me go “hmmm” and leaves me wondering, what is even the point of this game of his???

Another thing that I don’t get about Kohl is why he’s afraid to come down the stairs in our house?  We have open concept stairs, meaning that there is no backing between the treads.  Once, only once in his entire life, back in May 2016, he had a little slip where one of his back paws slipped through one of the openings and for the love of God if he hasn’t been TERRIFIED to go down them ever since.  One time he came up to my room behind me, hung out while I showered, got ready to leave and then, because it had been WEEKS of him being hysterical at the top of the stairs and us practically carrying him down, I decided to not “cave into” his crying ways.  I was going to tough love him out of his fear and leave him up there until he finally came down on his own.  Man oh man, he was up there crying, pacing, panting, being completely ridiculous for what felt like forever.  Finally I had to leave the house, so up I went to grab a hold of him and half carry him down.  What I encountered was not at all what I expected.  Kohl had emptied his bowels all over my bedroom floor, like EVERYWHERE and it was diarrhea, needless to say I was very, very late getting to where I needed to go.  Guess I really showed him…

And last but not least we have Duke.  Duke is a walking, constant being that makes me go “hmmm” like why when nobody is around he can jump on every single bed in the house, we know this to be true because he has a passion for laying in the pillows. Yet if you’re actually on your bed he all of a sudden can barely lift his chin high enough to rest on the mattress to cry and moan about needing your help to get up on said bed.  There’s also the aversion he has to peeing on anything that is grown in nature.  I’m serious about this.  He would way rather pee on a concrete light post than a tree, on all my outdoor furniture and planters than a bush.  Why, oh why, oh why is he this way???

And to close today’s post out about just a few of the things that make me go “hmmm” about our four legged kids, if we were picking a winner, I’d have to say that award goes to Duke.  What makes me go “hmmm” the most about Duke is his attitude toward any of the girls when they come home after being away from him for longer than a few days.  Believe me when I say that he displays the bitchiest attitude you have ever seen.  The other two boys could care less if the girls have been gone a day, or one month, they are greeted with the same unconditional love, but Duke pulls his love away, if you’re lucky for twenty-four hours, but most of the time he punishes you for a solid forty-eight.  Mikaela has officially been home for close to twelve hours, so let’s see how long he keeps his love away from her this time…

p.s photo credit to SARAH FISHER & JACKIE COOPER from getleashedmag.com

 

5 Comments

  1. I wonder if the case of Mack & his socks is a matter of, he likes them at first but then his paws get too hot/”restricted” (like one feels after wearing their shoes for too long) and then he has to let his paws “breathe” again.
    Or, he tolerates them being put on because he knows they’re helpful for him, but actually doesn’t care for them and after a while it’s like “Okay, I can *not* take this any longer! I’ll deal without.” Either process repeating after he’s had a break.

    (Kohl & his stuffies: <3
    Poor guy with his stair issues, though. Sounds like that slip was mega traumatic for him, despite it sounding like it was physically tame).

    And both cases (plus the stuffies <3) I think are more fine examples of dogs/animals being more "human~like" than some would give them credit for!

  2. I love dogs! I miss having them. They are all so different in personality. We’ve had a total of 5 in our house but have been empty nesters for 2 years now. I miss they’re little spirits and antics. From raging diarrhea all over the living room at Christmas to dragging part of a deer out of the woods AND proceeded to try and bring it in the house!!
    Thanks for the laughs and the memories it conjured up! Maybe Santa will bring me one this Christmas. It was the only thing on my list…. and I’ve been good!! Haha!

  3. Love, love this post! I see my current dog and past dog (kids) in all three of yours! Our last 2 kids (rescued cocker spaniels) had so many toys that I had large laundry baskets around the house for each of them and heaven if you threw one out – because it got so smelly, they would go to the basket and actually empty it and count and give you the “look” like I know that you threw one out – now give it back!

  4. What I have spent years doing is telling my cats and dogs “you are pains in the butt”. To which they always answer, “that’s our job”. I am the one who suggested the boxer/cancer website, but since it was my first comment, I didn’t see the name/email/website until after I submitted the comment. Natch.

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